Peaches and Steam

I’ve always wondered why I repeat this cycle every week. Thursdays, through to Sunday. Then I wake up Monday morning with a Hiss and a moan, wondering why the weekend has come and gone so fast. At a point I thought it was for lack of a partner to spend time with, to occupy me with her warmth and intellect.

So I searched out for a partner, helplessly I’m fed up at this point. For it seems I have been a victim of my own undoing, either looking in the wrong places or seeking the wrong virtues. I’m spent and I can’t care less. I can have any woman I want but the question is ‘Is that really important right now?’

Me, a lover of fun and good things of life, not overly committed to many things but verse in arts and discourse. Will I define myself by who I’m with, at such a time as this?
I shake my head in disappointment. I am still susceptible to those lonely feelings though, craving warmth and companionship. For it is natural to. Yet it is something that vexes me because I have in moments of weakness such as the one I rise from right now let it be a means of defining me.

Now Thursdays are no more while my body says Friday is under consideration, yet it is glad that I agree with it for Saturday. So we a becoming one again. No more Play every Thursday, Dub-c is in probation and The Dome can be glad I’ll still be there.

Last week saw me at these three places, not to have fun naturally but more as a spectator, the party animals I had with me barely noticed my state of introspection. My body was tired and my mind had been starved. In dissatisfaction it berated me, turning out open and empty palms that craved information, instead they were held before my thinking eyes shaking and barely still. I felt a ting of guilt, yet those hands where held before my thinking eye a little longer and I gave in, I knew I had been my own worst enemy and I was full of remorse.

Then I remembered a poem I wrote when long ago I once thought I could go no further.
Looking at it now I just laugh;

Past me it seems,
When I would throw caution to the wind,
Dispense with decency,
Now I watch with almost aged eyes,
Careful of what I divulge,
My tongue has aged,
I wish not to admit that my body
Too has.
I abuse this temple,
And time no longer hides its
Damages,
My miles now seem short
As nicotine and alcohol have been my
Play mates,
I seem weary in the face of physical exertion,
Now I walk like a time bomb,
Uncertain when I will explode,
Or rather implode,
For I know the damage shall eventually be within,


Many times I have tried to take in the reality
Of this path I tread,
Many detours have I taken but back to
This path do still return,
To bask in the misty ambiance of tobacco,
Invest in the self imposed blur of alcohol,
Yes I am lost,
Yet my mind wishes to indulge,
As I hear the slurred voices of my companions,
They too walk their own paths,
They have begun to show sign of tiring,
Looking for the next detour,
Not myself,
I still walk this path,
Like I feel indestructible,
Or is it that I am immune to such consequences
As the cancers and the liver failures?

Yet I have heard tales of sufferers,
Those who have failed to heed warnings,
How their last days were engulfed with pain,
Not me I sometimes say,
I’ll die a ripe old age of 90,
Like I were my own God,
Till I cough blood,
Till I fail to rise in the morning maybe,
I’ll still puff and guzzle,
Throw away healthy living and laugh
And laugh at the fit and able.

Looking at this piece now, I just laugh at the sheer ignorance that filled me when I wrote it. I sure am tired, and I’m worried for my health as well. Let’s just hope my detour stays permanent.

I saw Peaches last week while submitting my last Performance clearance. She was with someone else but she gave me a few minutes of her time. She said she was having a good time at her new office then as she left she gave me a warm hug. That encounter was still fresh in my mind when I checked facebook on Saturday night. Lo and behold, she had put up several of her modeling pictures and boy did they look good.
I was tempted to give her a call I must confess, then I thought again, ‘it’s not like any thing would change’.
Truth is I miss her, not because I’m lonely, it’s more to do with the honest friendship we both had before things changed.
Then there were no obligations to call each other initially, we just hung out at a bakery near my office, talking about stuff, laughing. She had this habit of pinching me on my side then given you this feigned serious look when you teased her, at this point her jaw would begin to shiver ‘cause she was trying to hold back a smile. I really do miss those times.

Its most probably pride that won’t make me give her a call right now or in the near future. I’ll probably sit this one out sulking and hoping I’m doing the right thing.

The Sleazy Lounge beats the Weekend Routine...

Its been two months since I've been nursing this Blog and it really is turning out to be a promising child. Though there are times when admittedly I have intentionally ignored it, there have been moments when upon looking at another person's blog i draw inspiration and regain the Will to nurture mine.

FBA posted a short on his blog talking about how tired he was while i just read XSN's post saying almost the same thing but in a longer version, it almost makes me feel as if an anti- blogging virus has hacked into their personal computers and is writing all this stuff.
Well as a newbie I have decided to put expectations at a moderate level while trying to make sure i don't make my post look forced, hence the obvious extended periods with out any post on my blog.

Now that Peaches and I have taken a break from each other, I've so quickly become accustomed to being single again, or maybe while I was in the relationship I never really took in the fact that I actually was in one, not to sound arrogant, i just still am trying to understand the whole experience.

Friday saw me getting into unexpected trouble; my CDS coordinator handed me a small piece of paper that could cause me several sleepless nights; on it was written clearly, "this is a query asking you to explain why you have missed you weekly CDS 10 times. I agreed to everything on the query except the '10 times part' , i mean I know I've missed some particular days, but claiming its up to 10 can't be possible (or is it.....?). Now i have a hearing slated for upper Friday.

With that date in mind I began my weekend routine but this time around things didn't turn out as before. It seems we've gotten so used to the routine that on this particular Friday night barring SBB we all got bored before things got into full gear, my case wasn't helped by the fact that Diva wasn't picking her phone calls. We ended up calling it a night earlier than we usually did.

Saturday proved much more interesting though, I woke up on a low, dragged myself about the house lazily for a couple of hours before making the bizarre decision to shave my moustache, the face I saw in the mirror was odd but not so bad until Mr. Capable said I looked like 'Bart Simpson'. I admit that the comment had me feeling vulnerable so by noon when Mystery came to the house and we all headed to the Barber's shop, i ended up shaving my beard as well. The look again didn't come out well, now I knew I had made an irreparable mistake. knowing I had promised myself not to cut my hair again at least till the end of the year, i still couldn't stand it any longer so with a defeated ego, i headed back to the barber for the second time that day and cut my hair. I feel i let myself down for not following through on the promise. Now I'm starting over and this time I'm keeping it strictly professional.

In between my insecurities and hair cuts me and the Boys met a Princess, as in her name is Princess and going by what she plans to do on children's day, she truly has the heart of one. Mr. Capable had met her the previous day and while they were getting acquainted she had claimed she was looking for and orphanage to visit on children's day, since Mr. Capable knew one a few streets from were we lived, he offered to take her there hoping one of us would hook up with her, but by the time we saw how honestly interested she was in this mini project we were all sold. We did our best to help liaise with the orphanage official we met.
The fact that such a young girl could have thought of such a noble act really touched me. On a day when several children around the world would have no parents to take them out to have fun, she was giving up her time to help these kids as well as spend time with them, I truly was touched. Did I mention Princess is gorgeous?

By night fall we were back at Dub-C, but this time we had Lil mama as well as Mr. Capable's girl with us... things turned out better than I had expected until we had to split up, not wanting to head home earlier than the night before, I hooked up with Lil mama and Phoenix for some club hopping.

This was the result:
Bounced at Play (reason being that I was not properly dressed.......???)

A- Lounge was virtually empty.....(we left the place immediately we got in)

so we decided to check out Krystal lounge. I have a natural dislike for the place, so much so that I'd prefer hanging out at Dub-C all night rather than spend a few hours there.

Krystal lounge to me is a place of Sleaze, the faces of the regulars there leave you feeling insecure about you environment. Prostitutes are the most prized clientele and there hardly is any room to move about freely.

I honestly hope they demolish the place, even for no reason at all. We ended up spending barely more than 30 minutes in the place, i was off chasing an over sized ass while Lil mama and Phoenix danced for a few minutes. By the time they signaled me that it was time to leave, I had gotten no where with the over sized ass. Phoenix dropped us off at home but i never made it to my room as I settled for the rug in the upstairs parlor (I think it was the idea that I was going to watch Skins for the first time that drew me to the living room).


By Sunday morning I started to think about the routine thing; is it all necessary? Do I have to be out all weekend? why does it have to be alcohol all the time? But also paramount on my mind was the fear of visiting that Sleazy Lounge again, the mere thought of it made me draw up a new routine I plan to implement if everything goes according to plan this week, but first I'll list my weekend routine;

Thursday: Eden garden

Friday: Dub-C and any club willing to admit me.

Saturday: Just Dub-C (have to go to church on Sunday morning)

Sunday:Eden Garden.

now my preliminary outline for a new routine is


Thursday: Karaoke at Play

Friday: Dub-C

Saturday: Spend time with Family and Friends during the day.

Sunday: Pool party at The Dome.

If any one has any suggestions let me know.

Meanwhile I still am hoping for something to be done about that stupid lounge oh....

My Weekend and Sam....

I have had one of the most forgettable weekends in ages in terms of my habitual nocturnal activities. I never imagined myself staying home on a Friday night intentionally with only local T. V content for company. Believe you me I so dearly want to forget this weekend, save for Friday afternoon when I totally got wasted before 3:00 PM.

There is one thing people should know about serving in Abuja, it can be wasteful; a Corper is likely to spend his community development days getting drunk half the time. Its double trouble if his CD is on Friday, because the likely hood of going clubbing is calculated into this probability.
After 3:00 PM my day was over, or more like my weekend was over socially, my other only compensation being that I hung out with the usual crew plus a few additions in the form of Diva and Dude. Dude had just come in from Lagos for work while I hadn’t seen Diva in a while.

As usual it was Dub-C through out, though the alcohol to human consumption ratio was a bit more concentrated. Apparently I was one of only 3 people expected to finish a bottle of Vodka, the others being Mr. Capable and Diva. Let me just say at this point that I will sadly not be giving you details of what happened as a result of the consumption of the Vodka (this is because of the gag order imposed on me by one of the participants).

Meanwhile every other seemingly smart person preferred Red wine, it seemed that there was something good about the particular bottle they were drinking cause they were not satisfied with one.

Like I said, the rest of the weekend was forgettable, that is until I watched T.V yesterday. Lil mama was watching E! New in the evening when they did a short on the hottest Australian actors in Hollywood. As most of you know by now, I’ve wanted to do a piece on Sam Worthington, and no it’s not because he’s good looking and Aussie. Rather it’s to rant about the meteoric rise he’s had over the year. Low and behold, there he was smiling on T.V as if to say; “mumu, nothing wey you fit do”(wonder how that will sound ). It really got me pissed I must say. Not like I have any thing against the guy personally, I just wish I knew some of his previous works so that I would know what to expect.

For those of you who don’t know, Sam Worthington is going to be in two major movies this year and they both have Box office dynamite attached to them. Being a movie buff, I’m always accustomed to following the lives of both established and up and coming actors. So I can say I’m able to predict who is next to blow based on their previous works or their present performance. I had always been good at it and if I had a paying job predicting the next big thing out of Hollywood, I’d probably be driving a Ferrari by now. Well that fantasy was threatened recently with the name peddling of Sam Worthington. Who the hell is he you might ask; well the little I can tell you guys about him personally is that he’s Australian, about 30 years of age, and has never done any T.V or movie outside Australia until now.
Right now he’s set to star in James Cameron’s big budget movie; Avatar, as well as the fourth installment of the Terminator franchise directed by McG; Terminator Salvation. Which he will co- star with Christian Bale. All this might seem senseless to you but I honestly don’t understand this particular guy’s quick rise, and as if to kick sand in my face while I was still struggling to understand what was going on, he’s just been confirmed as the lead (Persius) in the remake of Clash of the Titans. Tell me I’m only dreaming folks.

For the sake of the dude’s career I hope all these movies break the bank at the box office, if not he’ll just turn out to be a flash in the pan.

Meanwhile the whole dull weekend had me thinking about life after service. The recurring question going through my head being what I was going to do after service. So I’m just sitting here right now trying to figure that out..

May Day Weekend round up

I'm writing this post cause i feel there are some parts of the weekend I might have forgotten, incase you guys remember any thing i missed out between friday and Saturday, please feel free to update in the comment column.

I'm just sitting at my desk at the office, bored to death, scratching my growing facial hair (thats because i've made a promise not to cut it till next year) and wondering what i'm going to write about.


I spent most of last week thinking about a lot of things in my life and i had to admit to myself that there was something wrong with me, maybe I then proceeded to take it out on the two coniving sisters in my office. i don't know sha.... then i did something really wierd; i typed in the words personality disorder on google and soon enough i found a page that did personality disorder tests for free. It seemed funny that a series of random questions would tell me the extent to which i had a varying array of disoders to my personality.


After answering about 50 or so random questions it gave me a very interesting result to look at; the result was arranged in a table format, stating that i had a high likelihood of being paranoid, moderate likelihood of being a schidzoid (what ever that means).


It really was interesting to go further to read the analysis, but it soon got boring, as in really how can a series of random answers tell me to what degree I possibly could develop such and such personality disorder. To realize that i even went ahead to take the test and read the subsequent result really creeped me out.

So now i have personality disorders and they can be cured with very funny and expensive drugs..... scchhhrrrrreeecchhhpppp...., like i don't have better things to worry about.



Thursday:

I decided to take thursday off work and get some rest. It helped to a large extent. At least untill Chairman started asking me why I didn't go to work. That really pissed me off, you see for the past five months or so me and chairman have had some sort of silent agreement in our relationship; which has been "leave and let live", that is until Thursday, what ever made him ask me the question still baffels me, yet what make it worse is the fact that he went a step further to try and give me the talk. I wasn't in the mood for any of our usual "i'm smarter than you" verbal jousting so i let him have a field day with his Parental wisdom. By the time he was through I had my head nestled on a throw pillow snoozing off (not like I intended to ignore him, its just that his talk has become so monotonous these past few years that i can recite and guess correctly everything he has to say).

By 3:00 PM thursday i'm so bored out of my skin and helpless for ideas. I've been sleeping all day with nothing but how to start writing my new blog post when next i get to the office.

I'm actually having problems picking which topic i should write about first; between "WHO THE HELL IS SAM WORTHINGTON" & "THIS ALMOST ENDLESS RECURRING DREAM". These two issues have been bobbing around in my head for months now and i can't seem to find the steam in my engine to start writing on any of them.



By 3:30 PM Mr. capable calls in to tell me he's on his way home from Chambers (Ope Oh!!) at least it won't be me alone in the house, plus he's coming with my little dolls.



As per its thursday, there's always the possibility of going out tonight but its rather slim, by night fall me and Mr. Capable mutually agree to stay home tonight. We both know fully well that Friday is definately not going to be the same though.



Friday- Saturday:

Maama says friday is Spring cleaning, which i don't totally agree with. I would have preferred if it was "sleeping in till all your eyes puffed out day". The rest of the house get to work save for me, Mr. capable and lil' mama....

we stay put in our rooms doing nothing too serious, I'm just lying in bed thinking whether I should call Peaches or not (yes i have a girlfriend and i use that cheesy name for her). All that is soon put on hold when Chairman calls us downstairs, apparently the three of us are expected to take part in the spring cleaning, I didn't know oh......

Me and Mr. Capable opt to do some outside ground work that would make us look more macho (the one that requires the use of a hoe and cutlass). it takes us no less than 3 hours to complete. By the time we are true the blisters on my hands have me fuming..(I can't remember the last time I had them; maybe SS2?)

We hooked up with SBB and Mystery later in the evening; around 5:00 PM but by 6:00 we've not even left home cause Mystery's car security is acting up, so we're turned into emergency mechanics and to make matters worse the street lights aren't on (because of PHCN) so we have to use the flash on Mr. Capable's camera phone.

By the time we're through sorting out the car problem its about 7 :00 PM and our first port of call is Dub- C, as usual its getting packed and lively, the DJ doesn't seem to be on point tonight though. As the night goes on we're soon joined by a few more friends, its definatley gonna be a long night cause everyone soon starts asking for another drink and we've only just finished a bottle of Red Label, so the next thing we go for is a Blue Smirnoff Vodka...... we call it "Amnesia".
We all soon agree that we'll be hanging out at a A- lounge which just newly opened. It turnsout to be a good choice cause we get guest appearances from Wande Coal and M.I. i actually thought Wande was really fat but apparently Mr. Capable is even fatter than him...lol.... i think i dance till about 3:45 AM the next morning and by the time we were leaving the club, my ears felt like they had ear muffs on them. SBB had to scream through the phone when i called him to confirm where he had parked.

Funny enough I woke up at about 9: 00 AM that same morning, no hang over was in the air and Manchester United had an early kick off but because of everybody's slow motion we missed the entire first half of the game. Gladly United won the match with little or no fuss so i didn't need to check my heart rate once every 30 seconds.

After the game SBB left us to take care of some personal matter (*wink * wink).... while the rest of us hooked up with a few other guys at a spot in maitama.....
the rest of the weekend was rather normal stuff though, i eventually hooked up with Peaches on Sunday and believe you me it was the second shortest meeting we've ever had (we'll talk about that later).